Bad God

Here’s how it started: I spotted God strolling in the fading garden at sunrise and shouted, “Okay, God. Get in here right now. You’re in serious trouble, old man. Serious.” If God had a middle name, I would have used it. Like, “God Henry, I mean it.”

God heard me and waved. God heard me and pointed at the sky. God heard me and heard me and heard me because I didn’t stop yelling until I had dissolved in a coughing fit from over-exertion. It was only then God approached, slapped me on the back, and helped me catch my breathe.

“Pretty upset, huh?” God said.

“Oh, don’t try that Carl Rogers stuff on me,” I said. “You know damn well you’ve got to do something about your fake followers. Have you seen them, enshrining cruelty? Greed? Millions dancing at the thought of women forced to carry unwanted fetuses to term as if that’s what you want, rejoicing about your amazing creation being endlessly “developed”? Have you noticed the air quality? The hurricanes? The fires? The poor?”

“Slow down, partner,” God said. “Last day of good weather for a while. And it looks like you’ll have your first female Vice President, and she’s from Indian and Black parentage, and she’s smart. There’s that.” To my surprise, there were tears in God’s eyes. I mellowed a little, but the image of my neighbors wearing those detestable red hats with insulting slogans didn’t fade enough. I live in a beautiful place that voters have placed in the hands of the rich and morally corrupt. I live among people unwilling to pay taxes to care for the sick, the widowed, the poor, the broken. Unwilling to even pay their fair share for the common good.

God saw my despair. “Well, honey. You all have a long road ahead. I’ll give you that. Let’s try something, O.K.?”

I nodded. With God, a nod is a dangerous thing but not as dangerous as saying no.

“Pick a neighbor with a red hat. And get the image of the face clear in your mind’s eye.”

I complied, but there was a low guttural sound in my throat.

“Now, take the face gently into your hands and let your eyes speak love. Let your pain show. Let the truth generate a kind of holy light around you both.”

My hands clenched. My eyes burned. “I can’t do this,” I said to God. “I just want to snap the neck and be done with it.”

“I know,” God said. “But then who’d pay the taxes?” He laughed at his own bad joke, extended his elbow to my imagined neighbor, and they walked arm in arm back to the garden. God offered my neighbor some carrots. My carrots. My garden. My Bad God, out there loving my damaged, vicious neighbor, sharing my harvest.

I remained outraged, but I didn’t dare summons Bad God a second time. Who knows what else he’d give away? I just watched and sipped my beer.

10 thoughts on “Bad God

  1. I love you, Rita, and the raw and authentic way you allow your broken heartedness to bleed into words that heal. Thank you for pouring your heart out, for letting go into love, for offering yourself as nourishment to others in this challenging time of Awakening. Keep the faith!

    On Sun, Nov 8, 2020, 9:00 AM Short visits with an honest God wrote:

    > Rita Sommers-Flanagan posted: ” Here’s how it started. I spotted God > strolling in the fading garden at sunrise and shouted, “Okay, God. Get in > here right now. You’re in serious trouble, old man. Serious.” If God had a > middle name, I would have used it. Like, “God Henry, I mean it.”” >

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This jolts me to alertness. “Fake followers”? Yup, get it, a source of incredulity and frustration, grief, abandonment. The MAGA hats of hypocrisy and self-delusion. But then to take that face and look into it and let my eyes speak love. This takes awareness and quick thinking, to recognize the moment, as such interactions are fleeting brief. it takes a change in my underlying anger, resentment, and bewilderment. Thankfully I live with a woman of a more gentle temperament. As an anecdote-during the last weeks of the campaign, I was phone banking (hate it) and we would hold Biden signs at a busy intersection as people were going home from work. We got lots of thumbs-up and horn-honking, but also some thumbs down and middle fingers. I don’t know how to respond. The temptation to respond in kind is great but accomplishes nothing other than amplifying the acrimony. So, following Beth’s lead, I would blow them kisses. Thank you, Rita.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Sending congratulations from across the ocean ❤
    I find extending grace truly hard at times and I am impressed with the President Elect’s comments on unity. I only hope my country can have a turn around.
    Take good care Rita xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Carol! We are all hopeful but worried about the transition–getting a deranged bully out is tricky….but I think we can do it. I hope the whole world can stop endorsing bullies, greed, and violence…Cheers!!

      Like

  4. Thank you so much for the reminder🕊😈🥰

    On Sun, Nov 8, 2020 at 9:00 AM Short visits with an honest God wrote:

    > Rita Sommers-Flanagan posted: ” Here’s how it started. I spotted God > strolling in the fading garden at sunrise and shouted, “Okay, God. Get in > here right now. You’re in serious trouble, old man. Serious.” If God had a > middle name, I would have used it. Like, “God Henry, I mean it.”” >

    Liked by 1 person

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